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TRADING THE BUCKET LIST IN FOR THE F##K IT LIST

Everyone I know is downsizing. We still come home from our travels with souvenirs for the grandchildren, but nothing more to adorn, decorate or set off the too many things we already own. “Not one more thing for the Box,” declares Henry, which is where he puts the chotchkes his wife can’t keep herself from […]

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Filial Love by Fiat: Attention Must Be Paid!

The news that China has had to officially remind its citizens to look after their elderly parents rippled across the tranquil watering holes of summer afternoons like pebbles tossed into a pond. While trying (or not) to let go of our grown kids and enjoy the responsibiity-free years between now and that distant country of […]

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What Kind of Parents Were We?

“What have you been doing since graduation?” It’s the kind of question you hear from former classmates who still look vaguely familiar, even if you haven’t seen them in decades and have no idea who they are. No one at reunion replies “housewife” any longer, not even the elegant, bird-like alumnae from the thinning ranks […]

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Welcome to the Third Decade – Yours and Theirs

The Third Decade is a specific period  in the lifespan of two generations of adults, one in its third decade of living and the other in its third decade of parenting.  Conveniently tucked in between adolescence and adulthood for the millennials and Modern Maturity and Social Security for the boomers, social scientists disagree about whether […]

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Would You Tell Me About Your Grown Kids?

If you have a 20 to 34 year old “emerging adult,” I’d like to hear from you for a new book about how you’re navigating this third decade with them.  Whether yours are already launched or still (or back) at home, chances are you’re still closely connected to them, even though your relationship has changed. […]

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Grown Kids Living At Home? Take This Survey…Please!

If you have grown kids living at home and would like to participate in a new book on the subject, I’d like your input! Please copy this questionnaire into a new document, answer the questions, and return it by e-mail to info@janeadams.com.  All answers will be confidential – but if you’re willing to be interviewed, […]

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Will They Still Love Us When We’re 64?

In sixth grade I had a best friend who called her parents by their first names. I thought that was very cool and tried it at home, but my father and mother just laughed before they made one thing perfectly clear: They were not my friends, and therefore not to be addressed as such.That was […]

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HOW CLOSE TO YOUR GROWN KIDS IS TOO CLOSE?

According to recent academic research, depending on your parents for life’s necessities past the time when you were expected to provide them for yourselves isn’t as soul-destroying as it might have felt to them when they were your age. In fact, it’s brought you closer — a lot closer. I’m not quarreling with the data. I’m […]

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Permanent Parenthood Redux

With births to unmarried women continuing to rise — 4 out of 10 in 2009, a two-decade increase of — it’s clear that the real threat to the sanctity of marriage isn’t coming from gay couples wanting to marry. A close look at the data reveals thechanging demographics of single motherhood; while unmarried teen pregnancy decreased […]

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Permanent Parenthood – a New Life Stage?

According to the real  numbers reported recently by a more reliable source, the  U.S. Census Bureau,  it’s not the class of 2012  parents should be worried about, it’s their older siblings; last year nearly 30 of 25-34 year-olds – about 5.9 million adults – co-resided with their parents, a 26% increase from 2007. And while […]